We have a mighty big Chronicle in store for you today. Well, probably. YFC doesn't really plan out each edition of The Chronicle, it just sort of unfolds. That said, you might wanna pull up a comfy chair (or one of those inflatable doughnut things if you need 'em), methinks that it's gonna be a long one...
As my oh-so-smart readers know, if today is Tuesday, it must be a chemo day. Wait, did you catch that? Of course it's not Tuesday, it's Wednesday...YFC just wanted to see if you were paying attention...he's such a silly goose! It's a BIG day today. Not only is Mom is visiting with the Cotton Troll, but Cousinie Scott has graced us with his presence. Yes, today Cousinie Scott is being inducted as a Chemo Buddy and we couldn't be prouder (Melvin thought it was no big deal, but Mom and I sure do...welcome to the fraternity, cuz). Yes, Melvin the Wonder Sis made it too...and YFC was able to capture the moment on his new digital camera (but more on that in just a bit).
Let's first me onto the chemo front...well, you know that appointment that Mom had scheduled with Dr. Mellott? Troll's being what they are (just be clear: never trust anyone who spends their free time hanging out under bridges) there was a mix-up with the scheduling. Accordingly, Mom will see her on Friday.And sadly, we got the news that Mom's chemo will be pushed off to Friday as well. Mom's platelets were too low for chemo. Her platelets registered an 83 and they should be at 100 to have chemo (though she once was able to take treatment at 95), so it'll be put off for a couple of days. Hopefully Mom and Cotton Troll will be able to put their heads together (Mom a regular human head, Cotton, a slightly elongated troll-like visage with white hairs popping up in unexpected places).
Well, a missed appointment would normally be cause for disappointment, but for Mom and YFC it just meant that we got to spend more time with Cousinie. After Mom was told that we weren't going to have chemo today, Cousinie exclaimed "well let's blow this popsicle stand!" YFC calmly explained that this term hasn't actually been used since 1995. It wan't particularly clever then, and the dozen years since it was last used didn't improve matters any. Chaos ensued. Cousinie yelled, "let's make like a tree and leave" and again YFC was put in the unfortunate position of having to explain that his lingo was dated, in this case to 1996 (at least Cousinie was making progress, albeit slowly). "We are so outta here!" -- phrase circa 1997. Finally Mom just said "let's go to lunch" and so we did exactly that, with Scottie sulking all the way.
Lunch with Cousinie was quite yummy and it was nice to catch-up on the family gossip (one of our cousins has webbed feet! Who knew?). Still, the most important news was that Cousin Lauren (or as Scottie alternately calls her "daugher Lauren", "Lauren" and "Hey you kid that takes all my money") is doing quite well after her recent diagnosis with Crohn's disease. The entire staff of The Chemo Chronicle -- from the editor, to the reporters, to various and sundry administrative personnel -- wish Lauren well.
Well, for a day that didn't have chemo there's certainly a lot to catch up on. Last Saturday Mom, Melvin and YFC spent an evening with
Uncle Russell (a/k/a Uncle Rusty, Papa, and our very own Kris Kringle). It was truly a glorious evening. Not only did we enjoy Papa's company, but we got kickass presents to boot! In fact, the very pictures that you're seeing in today's Chronicle come courtesy of the new digital camera that YFC received from his dear sweet Uncle. Speaking of, YFC is shameless (hard to believe, but true). He rather likes getting gifts, so to ensure that Uncle can continue his generous ways, be sure to stop by Colletti Gallery on Oak Street the next time you want to buy an antique poster or three. Plus, if you whisper the words "Your Faithful Correspondent" you get a generous 2% off the purchase of your new (well, new to you) Tolouse-Lautrec. When you think about it, this deal really works for everyone. You know how you're always writing to say that seeing YFC smile provides you with the warmth of a thousand suns? Well, if you go to the Gallery, Uncle Rusty will be happy. In turn, he'll have money for presents thereby making YFC happy. And as we've pretty much established, when YFC is happy the whole world is happy.
Yesterday, we dined at Chez Berba for the non-Christmas Christmas dinner. Aunt Roberta spurned the traditional Chinese feast and instead served a delicious prime rib. YFC was lucky enough to have a large hunk of meat tumble onto his shirt last night, so while typing he is simultaneously sucking on the juicy remnants of last night's spill. Mom's contribution to our non-holiday meal was an unbelievably good salad (hard to imagine that it could be so scrumptious), while YFC contributed as a raconteur, chauffeur, and as an all-around good egg.Well, there will surely be a Friday update. Until then remember that, much like YFC is the favorite child, YOU are his favorite reader.
Faithfully,
Corey
4 comments:
Thanks for the shoutout. I am feeling 100x better than I did when I went to the hospital! I like that my dad still thinks its 1997. We don't really tell him that is almost 2008, but I am glad you stepped in to make fun of him.
And for the record, I really need to know who has webbed feet!?!?
We're glad you're feeling better. As for your Dad thinking that it's 1997...I'm not really even sure that captures it fully. To save him embarrassment, I decided against mentioning his Members Only jacket (1985), Oakley sunglasses (1992), and his insistence on blasting Olivia Newton John''s "Physical" (1981)from the car radio (which he referred to as his "hifi").
You're probably too young to know the video, but if you're interested: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VQXECBdPgEA
As for the webbed feet, I was sworn to secrecy but I can give you a hint. Do you know anyone who swims a little faster than their geneaology might otherwise suggest?
Dear Cousinie Corey,
I did all those things you mentioned but you failed to acknowledge I put my foot down at spray and washing your skid marks.
I still call the CD a hifi and the TV remote is a clicker.
It was a true honor to spend quality time with the lovely Novick women and the handsome Novick man. I hope to do this again sometime.
Lunch was fun, I enjoyed trying to solve the world problems(family). Those Oakley sunglasses are fairly new by the way.
Cousinie Linguine, it's funny that you mention putting your foot down...when we were at the restaurant, your feet couldn't even hit the floor.
And I must confess that I also call the remote the clicker and your Oakleys were very chic.
I hope to see you again soon...
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